Do Our Tears Matter?

By Charleen Burghardt

“Don’t cry.” “Get over it!”

Clichés said that when someone cries or weeps. Does our Western society shame us into believing we should suppress sobs in public? But whether others are comfortable, tears express emotions and provide an outlet.

We often hold to the notion that tears show weakness or are something to be ashamed of. On the contrary, shedding tears is a healthy way to vent emotions. A good cry is good for our well-being. https://www.webmd.com/balance/features/is-crying-good-for-you

It’s okay to cry, and God gave us tears.

Tears provide an outlet

Tears can express sadness, grief, hurt, anger, frustration, or joy. They release emotional intensity.

My eyes often mist about my oldest son needing a liver transplant. How unfair this seems to him. My mind races to what-ifs, and my heart aches for his struggle. Of course, I fear the worst. Sadness floods my soul, and my eyes become moist.

That may be why tears are on my mind. I am learning how vital it is to allow space to let emotions well up inside me and let those emotions drip down my face.

Tears offer a release

Tears can express sadness, grief, hurt, anger, frustration, or joy, releasing emotional intensity.

My eyes often mist about my oldest son needing a liver transplant. How unfair this seems to him! My mind races to what-ifs, and my heart aches for his struggle. Of course, I fear the worst. Sadness floods my soul, tears flow.

That may be why tears are on my mind. I am learning how vital it is to allow space to let emotions well up inside me and let those emotions drip down my face.

Tears as a physical benefit

Crying is a natural response to stress, fear, and emotional and physical pain. How often do we try to silence tears? Scientific evidence shows crying brings physical benefits. Research from Harvard Health shows that tears provide a release, like a pressure value, relieving pent-up feelings.

I knew a friend who picked a stirring movie, like Hallmark classics, to watch at the end of the week. She wanted to cry during the film to release the stress from her job. Friday night became movie night, a ritual. Maybe she discovered movie therapy.

Crying releases stress and can help maintain better mental health.

Tears bring a calming by activating the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS), triggering us to relax.

They release oxytocin and endorphins, which make us feel better, helping emotional relief and improving contentment.

Do those facts give your permission to cry?

Tears as a Way to Grieve

One characteristic of grief is shedding tears. For some, weeping comes easily; for others, it does not. However, when we let tears flow in those times of grief, they provide release. Giving way to sobs in grief often gives a lightness, an ability to breathe deeper, and even sleep better.

When emotions shower from our eyes, crying can be an outward expression of grief and a way to mourn a loss. Bereavement support groups encourage crying as an essential part of grief.

We see in Scripture that Jesus wept over Jerusalem when grieving over the unbelief in the city, and later, Jesus wept in sorrow at the death of his friend, Lazarus. Knowing Jesus wept in grief, helps us know that tears were part of his grief and that he understands our grief. Tears are a human expression of grief.

When I lost my best friend, I initially cried for hours. I didn’t understand the blubbering but later realized it offered a way to mourn. Also, as a chaplain, I learned to provide space for people to grieve, including tears. “Letting it all out” can give us peace and the ability to breathe deeper.  

Permit yourself to mourn with tears. Invite God into the space of your grief. Solace and healing will come.

Are we afraid to be vulnerable when we shed tears?

Conversely, our tears show an openness that allows others to comfort and encourage us when we need it most.

Tears as Prayers

“Hear my prayer, Lord!  Listen closely to my cry for help!
Please don’t ignore my tears!” Psalm 39:12 (CEB).

Sometimes we lack words to pray when intense pain or sorrow strikes. Sometimes soft sobs or loud weeping are all we can get out. That’s okay. Our hearts break without the ability to verbalize our thoughts or emotions, and only moisture runs down our cheeks. Those tears contain our prayers. We admit the hidden things in our hearts and allow our feelings to surface. With tears as prayers, humility, and surrender become our postures, creating authenticity in our relationship with God. In a raw way, we become open to committing our most profound burden or sorrow to God.

In 1 Samuel chapter 1, Hannah cried in anguish as she prayed for a child. Her tears with no words showed her brokenness. The priest, Eli, assumed she was drinking and did not realize her heartfelt prayer through her weeping. God granted her request for a child, Samuel. From this story, we see prayers don’t need words.

Prayers don’t need words

When we offer tears as a prayer, it is enough. Those are precious offerings, treasured by God, whose shoulders are broad enough to handle our tears.

Tears are enough

When only groaning comes, we have a helper, the Holy Spirit.

Paul writes about the Holy Spirit, “If we don’t know how or what to pray, it doesn’t matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God“ Romans 8:26 (MSG).

Tears Matter to God

We wonder, do our tears matter to God but a verse in Psalms acknowledges the significance of our tears and how God treasures our tears. Joy or other emotions can cause flowing from our eyes, but God sees all the tears fall, not one is forgotten but each collected.

“You yourself have kept track of my misery. Put my tears into your bottle— aren’t they on your scroll already?” Psalm 56:8 (CEB).

The Divine One counts and cares enough to collect our teardrops. This poetic imagery compels us to appreciate how deeply and with such detail God knows us. God cradles our joy and sorrow.

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he saves those whose spirits are crushed” Psalm 34:18 (CEB).

Tears have a physical benefit, so release your emotions through tears. Crying is one way to mourn our grief; we can offer prayers of tears without words. Most significantly, God knows each teardrop.

Someday there will be no tears.

“He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever” Revelation 21:4 (NLT).

But until then

Our Tears Matter to God

Thank you for reading this post. I hope you share this.

Also, check out my page named Bookshelf on the Home Page. I listed books with some descriptions that I enjoyed reading. Take a look.

Grace offers hope,